Maybe you’ve heard of it, and maybe not … but that seems to be the case Taylor Swift has had a stalker for the past 2 years or so.
His name is Eric Swarbrick – And he’s been threatening pretty horrible things.
Starting with his desire to rape and kill her – and in the same sentence he declares his “soul mate”.
Now these are pretty weird things, I’ll admit it right away …
But it gets a little messy worse when you start saying things like:
– “I have learned to absolutely repress the metaphorical monster that is in me, but very soon I will become completely responsible for myself … What a logical conclusion there is that it is not death.”
– “I will not hesitate to kill her … and there is nothing that you, your lawyers or the law will be about to do about it. Remember who I am.”
Wow, friend … lighten up.
Besides, his letters have been even more creepy and frightening during the last months.
Ara, Taylor Swift has received a restraining order against him. The judge ordered Swarbrick to stay away from her property and to stop contacting her immediately.
The big concern here is always whether he would carry out some of the threats he has been making.
Hopefully he’s just a guy trying to get some publicity, but there’s always the possibility that he won’t. And Taylor Swift needs special care to be a high profile celebrity who will attract many new ones.
And you? Have you ever had a boyfriend who wouldn’t leave you alone?
I think most women have come across a guy who wouldn’t accept a no in response.
But there are a lot of guys who have played the weird middle ground between persistence – something women appreciate if they show a great passion for it – and the other extreme.
Harassment is no joke.
So where does it go too far?
From what I’ve seen, it goes too far when a woman clearly expresses no interest, but he doesn’t back down. If you have made a sincere attempt to express that you are I’m not interestedand he won’t listen, at least you know you have a boy to watch out for.
Now, most guys are pretty decent at heart. They wouldn’t hurt no one.
But every now and then a bad guy comes out of the group, so you have to be careful.
Which brings me to this:
3 questions to ask your boyfriend
And these questions are good because they eliminate guys who are out of your comfort zone.
Because, let’s face it, sometimes you start having a relationship with a guy, and then it becomes a big job.
So you want to be able to use some questions to help you figure out your personality as much as you can. You are looking to find out if you have major control issues, as this is one warning sign of this bully mentality.
These questions can be used to learn more about him, as well as to tell you if he has this obsessive love complex that can get ugly.
Question no. 1 To do this to your boyfriend: Do you think you’ve never persecuted a woman too much?
This will cut directly to the chase, very directly.
If he declares that there is one NO WAY I would never do such a thing, without even stopping to think about it, you should pay attention. Because what you want to see is a moment of reflection, where he really thinks about the question for a few seconds.
Because we know that if it has gone too far in the past, so be it creepy asshole stuff, I would never really admit it.
So you have to be more subtle and listen to what they don’t say sometimes.
Even better is if she tells you a story about one that almost went too far, and it’s kind of silly like “I called her in the middle of the night” or “I brought her flowers before the date.”
Harmless things often say that he has learned the lessons of his youth and has matured a little. Because a lot of boys (and girls) do stupid things when they’re kids, just to grow up and get out of it.
Question no. 2 To ask your boyfriend: Have you ever been arrested?
Now, you’re not just going to start a conversation with him, are you? Don’t throw that in his face and hope he doesn’t feel a little intimidated.
Instead, add it to a conversation later, when it has warmed up a bit.
It’s especially good if you can talk to him about some crazy stuff you’ve done and why you haven’t been arrested. Then it seems like a reasonable question.
And then listen to whatever comes after you don’t like it. And also listen to the things they do NOT tell you.
Question no. 3 To ask your boyfriend: What is the most powerful and romantic type of love?
The purpose of this question is simply to see how you think about romance and romantic relationships.
Most guys who end up going to extremes have a vision that they do quite extreme. They overly romanticize love and will have unreasonable expectations of a relationship.
Of course, even these guys won’t necessarily become crazy bullies.
But guys do leave clues, so be sure to filter them out with a few specific questions to ask your boyfriend.
You may be surprised at what you hear …
Before I finish, let me give you a couple of clues to consider in the behavior of a potential bully:
4 signs that it is a potential harasser
1. It’s too intense: When they look at you, they have made the decision that you are what they want, at least for now. Harassers maintain strong eye contact in a way that can be overwhelming.
2. Pass without warning: Her unannounced behavior is what makes women more nervous. You feel confused, a little flattered. But you also feel nervous because, deep down, your instincts are telling you that this is weird behavior.
3. He knows more about you than you said: These guys are on a mission to get as much information about a person as possible. Harassers will ask anyone who knows or knows details about you once they have fixed on you.
4. They react from a creepy aggression: If you make them angry, jealous, or threatened, they enter a mode of abandonment that can be terrifying.
Watch out for the guys who hook your instincts.
Trust your instincts and always pay attention to unequal behavior …
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