Eye contact attraction The power of eye sex (updated in 2022)

Written by men’s dating coach Gary Gunn, founder of Social Attraction

This article will teach you how to create an eye contact with women. These are the tried and tested strategies I have been teaching in my confidence courses in Social Attraction for the past twelve years.

It will help you avoid the following:

  • Feeling inadequate when talking to a woman you find sexually attractive.
  • First look away when you try to keep in touch with an attractive woman.
  • Feeling embarrassed when you bend over to kiss a woman and she walks away.

No one should feel so helpless in their dating life – it’s wrong.

We can help you do just that by taking one of our Social Attraction courses. You’ll find a link at the bottom of this article to schedule a 30-minute consultation call with me. In the call, we’ll find out which of our courses is right for you to transform your confidence in dating.

You can also see the real transformations of our customers here: reviews of social attraction courses.

Does eye contact always mean attraction?

Women’s eye contact has different meanings, and it’s crucial to be able to decipher the different types:

  • If you have eye contact with a girl and she is looking down, this is a sign that she may be attracted to you.
  • If you look up and away, this is usually a sign that a woman is unattractive to you.
  • Finally, if you look sideways, there is an ambiguity, that is, it may or may not be attracted to you.

Considering the other responses of a woman’s body language when you first make eye contact will help you identify any mutual attraction.

Eye contact signs of attraction

In my professional opinion, if a girl is attracted to you, she will give you a bunch of body language signs.

These are the top three:

  • Touching her hair
  • Prolonged smile
  • Deep eye contact

I remember teaching these techniques to a 19-year-old client in Edinburgh who was attracted to women in their late 20s.

He looked confident, charming, and charismatic, but he couldn’t keep in touch with women. We found her external confidence to be appealing to younger girls. However, when he spoke to safer women, they could see through the bravado.

So we started from scratch. I managed to get my client to stop talking and maintain eye contact for sixty seconds with my female coaching assistant. That was the first time in his life that he had the gaze of a woman. He said he felt vulnerable at first and wanted to look away.

However, after twenty seconds, he relaxed and began to feel a magnetic thrust in the girl’s eyes. Welcome to the power of eye sex – not bad at 19!

I’ve created the following infographic guide to help you recognize the other signs of when a woman is flirting. It would be helpful if you also read my signs that the article is flirting.

15 signs that a woman is flirting and trying to create an attraction for eye contact

Signs of mutual attraction eye contact?

The best way to find out if there are signs of eye contact with mutual attraction is to look for a particular combination of a woman’s responses.

As mentioned above, these are called body language groups and the main thing to keep in mind is eye contact with the play of hair. When I started training men to meet women during the day, I noticed this particular body language group of women.

In general, if a woman first sees us and then plays with her hair and looks down, she is receptive to starting a conversation.

Hairstyle with eye contact

If we stop for a second and think about our response when we see an attractive woman, our automatic reaction is to feel an increase in energy in our body. Sometimes we label it as “anxiety”, I prefer to label it as a “call to action”.

However, in my experience, women also feel this same increase in energy in their bodies. Women often channel this energy to play with their hair, which has the powerful effect of drawing our attention to their body.

The biology behind eye contact

Understanding these biological responses helps us to have the confidence to walk and start a new conversation with women.

This knowledge is a hidden gem that I have been teaching my clients for years. I remember teaching a 27-year-old client in London who had a shotgun approach to talking to women. Instead, we improved his style and showed him the eye-catching signs of eye contact to keep in mind. And now he is approaching fewer women (the ones who give him the go-ahead), but he has a much higher dating success rate.

In my infographic below you will find three powerful principles that enhance your appeal to women. You can also read my article on how to attract women instantly.

Three different ways to attract women instantly

Maintain eye contact attraction?

The easiest way to generate eye contact with a girl is to keep eye contact with her until she looks away first.

Maintaining eye contact in this way is effective because it has been scientifically proven that the longer you maintain eye contact with women, the more oxytocin is released.

Oxytocin is a chemical linked to our feelings of love and closeness to women.

Supercharged eye contact

To increase eye contact with women, lift your chin to the point where you can no longer see your feet.

By raising your chin to this level, raise your posture and demonstrate powerful, dominant body language.

This has the effect of preventing us from looking down or looking away first when we meet women.

Insecure eye contact

Breaking eye contact with a woman and looking elsewhere is a big sign of insecurity, and one that women notice.

I have created the following infographic to describe other signs of insecurity that are turning off women.

You can also read my men’s dating coach article here, where I delve into these negative traits and how to overcome them.

9 reasons why men cannot create attraction through eye contact with women

Intense attraction for eye contact?

The best way to improve the attractiveness of eye contact with women is to slow down the voice.

Slowing down means you can maintain deeper eye contact without focusing on what you will say next in the conversation.

If you imagine kissing a girl for the first time, the slower you talk, the easier it will be to get closer and share intimacy.

Privacy of eye contact

Reducing your voice and maintaining intense eye contact are two guaranteed ways to have more confidence with women.

Once you have a basic level of eye contact and voice control, you can add other features to your dating strategy.

Attraction through eye contact and flirting with women are strategies we can teach you. For more information, visit our Transformational Confidence Courses page.


  • Read a woman’s eye contact: If she’s looking down, she’s interested in you. Left, and she’s not sure. If you look up and away, you are showing disinterest.
  • She is attracted to you when she plays with her hair while maintaining deep eye contact with you.
  • Don’t look away from women first because it conveys insecurity.

Your path to successful dating

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