Avoid these first date topics

Learn these 5 rules for online dating

Anyone experienced knows that sharing all your letters too soon in a relationship is not advisable.

Hmmm, this exact topic came up with my ex-husband on Thanksgiving Day (background: we were married for 24 years, we divorced 3 years ago, he goes online weekly, I’m in a relationship, but I had a little of online dating before!). So we are sitting in Palm Beach, digesting a multi-course dinner, our teenagers are walking away (yes, to take selfies) and my ex said to me, “Do you think people talk a lot on the first date? about her ex? and children ”?.

I laughed. Yes, too much. And how do you avoid that? We both exchanged dating stories, laughing at some of the fakes that made our first dates; it’s not that any of us are perfect in any way, but having dating as a career option with online dating advice is sometimes easy to know the polite. first date rules, but your date may surprise you!

5 topics to skip or change the theme as soon as possible:

1. Boast

My ex mentioned an extremely attractive woman he met through Bumble, who in 5 minutes described his alpha son with 6 early acceptance letters to Ivy League schools. (Maybe I was playing my ex’s Harvard Law degree, etc., but it quickly became nasty as the date passed: his son had not yet been admitted to Harvard and wondered if his date , (my ex!) whom she knew. all 10 minutes, I would write a letter of recommendation). It was a short date.

2. A family history lesson

Okay, let’s go on a first date to see if we like our date, not their families. After all, we’re not in college, oh, we’re taking someone home for a family vacation. Yes, it is certainly acceptable on a first date to mention that you have a set of three college-age twins. But we don’t need to know their names, aspirations or majors yet, or much more.

(Note: The 20% discount on cyber packages expires tonight – what a cyber week!).

3. Report your date on why you got divorced

Think of it this way – you’re in for a holiday cocktail and introduce yourself to an attractive man or woman. What would you talk about? Who organizes the party and how you are connected. Lady Gaga’s performance at The House of Gucci. Football. Vacation plans. Ted Lasso. So why explain your bachelorhood to a stranger on your first date?

4. Complain about online dating

O-hhhh-k, I get into connips about this one. First of all, you find yourself as a less than positive soul. So far, in my 30 years of online dating consulting and coaching, no man or woman has told me they would like a negative person. People, online dating has lost its stigma for years. You are doing it; your date does … and 60% of my clients have met someone online and have a meaningful relationship. Believe me, it is not those who complain who find the love of their life!


Treat it like a therapy session

Oh, oh. You are mixed and confused. This is a first date without a sofa in sight. Get a good therapist if you have problems with previous relationships. This is good and highly recommended. We all hurt, we have pain; these are things we discuss with a professional or close friends. But not a stranger on a first date. A first date should be light, easy and current conversation to see if there is connection and chemistry. Nothing more.

Simply, a first date is an audition for a second date. The holidays are a festive and lovely time of year so far, so I encourage you to take advantage of this beautiful time of year.

As always, I am here to help and train you. Congratulations to Steven in San Diego (yes, you are one of my favorite customers !!!) who got engaged on Thanksgiving Day with Melinda. (Oh, I trained him for 6 months, 7 dating sites and over 40 first dates!). But you only need one!

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