Signs that he could be an abused man!
Are you dating an emotionally damaged woman?
No matter what it looks like in the outside world, there are often subtle clues that you could be an abused man.
This applies whether you are just starting out or have been in a relationship for some time.
Yes, sometimes it is obvious. As if throwing things in your direction, or worse.
At other times, the signs that you may be an abused man (or will be if you meet the girl you think you want) are much more subtle.
But if you don’t do anything, things will get worse …
… And the next thing you know, you’re guessing and asking permission to do just about anything …
If you feel like you’re always having an eggshell with her, this post is for you.
Signs that he could be an abused man
This will not be a video about Will Smith or Johnny Depp.
But if you really like the girl you like, or would like to get into it;), but you have searched Google for “signs that you may be an abused man,” this is actually the number 1 sign.
1.Intuition, also known as You’re Here!
If your instinct is to seek help on the Internet, this could be a sign that you may be a battered man.
Men are too quick to rule out their gut instincts, especially when it comes to heart and back issues.
But men do have intuition and if that intuition has brought you here, you must be here!
2. Gas lighting
The second sign that you can be an abused man is if you fight hard and …
… These fights lead her to turn on the gas!
What is gas lighting?
That’s when the truth changes to make you feel like you’re crazy.
She wants you to go to the farmers market with her Saturday morning …
“I’d love for you to be with me, it’s important to me …”
Even though you’re exhausted from working OT, you drag your ass out of bed to go with it.
But you’re so tired that you get on a bumper along the way.
Not only is it scary because you didn’t get it, but it blames you for not taking care of yourself …
And when you tell her to keep her promises to her when they are important, she says …
“It didn’t matter.”
You answer, “You said yes.”
She said, “You misunderstood. Again.”
If this is you, stay with me, I have a solution.
And no, that’s not always the case.
3. Social control
At first, when you meet her, you want to spend all your time together.
But if you just spend time together, that’s not healthy.
And if she controls who you spend your time with, that’s a subtle sign that you can be an abused man.
Especially if you have started to lose friends or time with family that you care a lot about because she is convinced that they are not good for you.
But there is no real or reasonable reason to feel that way.
She’s shutting you down on social media so that only she stays with you and makes you feel like you can’t leave her.
Note: Make sure you are not engaging in any of these unhealthy behaviors.
And again, if you are, there is a solution, follow me.
4. Manipulation tactics
If you think you can’t have a difficult conversation about something to talk about …
… she lies, denies or manipulates you …
This is a sign that he could be an abused man.
You want to talk to her about not constantly talking about your family’s junk, which is kind-hearted and caring about your interests.
But when you raise it she says, “Love your mom, I just don’t like it interfering with your life.” #lying
Or, “I’ve never said I don’t like them.” #negar
Or, “I just want the best for you, girl. Why do you always have to turn around and become the bad guy?” #manipular
Which brings us to
5. Accusation in bulk
If she doesn’t trust you even though you’ve never done anything to make her feel that way, red flag.
Hint: A unique red flag doesn’t mean you have to leave. None of us are perfect. A red flag means something has to give! #exchange
Maybe she had a spoiled childhood that led to shitty relationships.
We’ve all been through things. We all have some luggage.
But just because you can explain why she’s emotionally abusive doesn’t mean you have to apologize!
Read it again.
You didn’t do anything wrong. Like, nothing.
But she accuses you of cheating.
You need to show your phone every time you go out, because it has been burned before.
Hint: You are not responsible for paying off your past debts.
This does not mean that you do not help each other with your luggage, but if your whole purpose in the relationship is to unpack your big suitcase of distrust …
This could be a subtle sign that he could be an abused man.
That is why it is necessary to have standards, limits and the ability to set and follow the consequences if these limits are not respected.
Which brings us to
6. Limits and erratic behavior
Ignore your limits and fly off the handle when you lift it.
Hint: Boundaries are healthy and necessary.
Tip: The difference between an ultimatum and a limit with consequences is in your delivery.
It comes from a place of love, both self-love and love for your partner, or it comes from a place of pure selfishness.
If your reactions exceed reasonable standards for the crime and everything you do is a crime, it’s not good.
Now, if you thought it was bad, the latter may be worse because there is no tangible evidence.
7. Criticism and contempt
There is a big difference between loving and constructive feedback and character murder.
Hint: Comments focus on your behavior. Criticisms focus on you as a person. Contempt expresses superiority over you.
If he makes subtle but disparaging comments about you as a person … maybe even with the appearance of helping you or …
… Turn your victories into losses by pointing out where you could have done better …
Maybe you have no respect and will treat you with contempt.
No matter what you do, she rolls her eyes or looks at you with disgust.
You tell him you’ve received a raise or a promotion.
She says, “It was time. You should have asked for a long time ago.”
What to do
The first thing you need to know, and you may not like this but it will help you, is …
We teach people how to treat us.
Therefore, the more of these abusive behaviors you have experienced, the more you let it go with yours.
Hint: if you let yourself be disrespected, you don’t respect yourself enough.
… openly express your standards and limits, either at the outset or as situations arise and …
… Follow the consequences of not respecting these limits.
It is much harder to turn a boat when it is out of port.
Hint: It’s much harder to recycle someone once we’ve let them develop the habit of treating us a certain way.
Is there any hope, Anna?
Aside from contempt, most of these behaviors can be changed if they are caught soon enough and she is not really a narcissist or psychopath.
You have to have standards, express expectations and limits … as long as you are not completely selfish or narcissistic.
(Probably not if you’re here!)
Ignoring bad behavior teaches others what they can do with theirs.
If you have problems setting or expressing boundaries or respecting them, I recommend that you speak with a therapist.
There is a wonderful online therapy option that is completely private and allows you to get help from anywhere with a wifi or mobile signal.
But wherever you choose to get professional help, do it.
Nothing changes if you don’t change.
You can only control your own behavior.
Love is not enough. But you have to start loving and respecting yourself.
I’ve said it many times …
… Women reflect your feelings about you!
If you allow yourself to be mistreated, it shows that you do not love yourself and do not respect yourself enough …
… which means she doesn’t either.
And the next thing you know is you’re beating Chris Rock at the Oscars or you’re on the court defending yourself against false allegations of abuse.
If you are struggling in your relationship or know you have problems with self-esteem, consider talking to a therapist or relationship coach.
Thank you for being here, GREAT HUG, God bless.
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